Jackson, Mississippi

I'm in Mississippi, reading a book about Mississippi. The book is The State of Jones, about a county that is reported to have seceded from the Confederacy after the Confederacy seceded from the Union.

The book is well researched and provides a good description of what life was like in the rural south for the families of soldiers. Sort of like Cold Mountain, but without the romantic emphasis.

I'm reading the electronic version on my netbook.

I like electronic books except that you can't read them on an airplane during taxi, takeoff and landing.

Also, if you fall asleep reading, the "book" could fall on the floor and break. Or you could roll over on it.

Oh, and sometimes you press the "next page" button the wrong way and you end up on page 1,764.

Come to think of it, I hate electronic books.

Icicles

We have big icicles hanging off the back porch roof. T wants me to knock them off. By getting up on a ladder I suppose.

I am considering possible outcomes. One involves me falling off the ladder. On the way down the biggest icicle breaks off. I hit the ground first. The big icicle is close behind.

Since the pointy end of the icicle is facing downward, I get speared to the ground. It is uncomfortable, painful, embarrassing. No one notices until Spring.

I'm not sure this icicle thing is a good idea.

Moorefield, West Virginia

Whether or not I could live in a place depends on how comfortable I feel walking into the local barber shop.

1. There has to be a barber pole out front. A functional one that twirls.
2. No more than four chairs. Actually 4 chairs would be pushing it.
   
3. No appointments accepted. I am wary of men who have to schedule haircuts. More wary of barber shops that tolerate them.
4. Under $20. Way under.
   
5. Average time per haircut: 10 minutes or less.
6. No styling. I don't want to wait 45 minutes behind some metro-sexual who wants to look like something out of GQ. No shampoos, either.
7. Barbers and waiting customers engage in a lively and pointless banter, usually at the expense of an elected official.

All things considered, I could live in Moorefield.

More Snow.

Tonight we're supposed to get 3 t0 6 inches. But I don't care. I'm going to West Virginia tomorrow.

I'll be driving a rental car. Someone will clean it before I pick it up. They'll clean it again after I drop it off.

I'll be staying in a hotel. If it snows someone will plow the parking lot and shovel the sidewalks while I'm sleeping.

When I get hungry I'll go to a restaurant. A nice person will take my order, bring the food when it's ready, and take the dirty dishes away when I'm done.

What a country! I can't wait...

Blizzard #2

Yesterday we got about 12 inches of snow on top of 18 from the weekend, for a total of around 30 inches. Plus drifts.

I wanted to just sit and look at it but T said we were out of butter, so I fired up the John Deere and cleared a path out to the road.

We can escape now if we have to. But I kind of miss the excitement of being snowed in.

It was like being in the Donner party, except with a freezer full of food. Plus some canned stuff in the pantry.

And of course we have Bonzi as a last resort.

Otis is not impressed.

Otis doesn't mind a dusting of snow but he is more than a little annoyed with the 16" we got last night. He is a Mediterranean Mini Donkey, after all.

His ancestors were conditioned to enjoy much warmer climates.

Black Cloud is more philosophical about the whole business. As long as he can get to his hay he doesn't care whether it snows 2 inches or 20.

Of course his belly doesn't get wet dragging across the top of the snow drifts. To say nothing of his...well, never mind.

He is a wimp when its raining, though.

Groundhog Day Redux

I got an email message from my friends and clients in Missouri today. They told me that they would have to endure six more weeks of winter this year, and that it was my fault.

After all, they reminded me, I was the one that murdered their groundhog! Check out the original Ground Hog Day post from December in the (likely) event you haven't been following the Ranch adventures closely.

Who says bankers don't have a sense of humor?